Emotional and Mental Health

Most of us do not train our minds to accept: An unfriendly situation. A self-imperfection. First of all, let us comprehend ‘an unfriendly situation.’ Time is not always favorable to us. Sometimes, when situations are hostile to us, what most of us do is try to avoid the situation or run away from the problem. We don't talk about it now. We don’t want to face it and hence, we try to overlook it. Now, let us try to understand ‘a self-imperfection.’ Nobody is perfect. We all are the effigy of imperfections and yes, there is nothing wrong in it. Nonetheless, how many of us have the courage to accept it? Trust me, only a few. Always remember that being imperfect is not a concern, the problem is the un-readiness of our minds to accept it. Whether it is an unfriendly situation or a self-imperfection, is the denial mode solution to our troubles? I am sorry but we are elevating our problems all by ourselves. Denying the fact that we are facing a problem is an invitation to other troubles. Always remember, how fast and how far we try to run away from an unfriendly situation or a self-imperfection, it will catch up with us soon. This time around, its intensity will be so strong that it will be virtually impossible for us to deal with it. A situation will arise in which neither we will be able to face it, nor we will be able to avoid it. Finally, we will never be able to move out of it. Let us understand it with the help of illustrations. Example 1 You are chit-chatting with your friends. Suddenly, one of them initiates a discussion about politics. Others too plunge into the discussion.  Say, you are the only one who is not updated in politics and you insist them to change the topic. The matter of fact here is you are getting bored because you are not proficient in expressing your views on the particular subject. However, the reason you give for it, ‘Politics is not an interesting subject’. Here, you are avoiding the fact that you are not acquainted with politics, which is the actual reason you are not finding it interesting. Still, you are not accepting it. Example 2 You appeared in 5 exams. You performed well in all subjects except mathematics. Subsequently, you begin to put allegations like the mathematics paper was lengthy. Yes, sometimes you also say that the course was out of syllabus. Again, instead of accepting the fact that you need to work on mathematics, you opt for the denial mode. Example 3 You get into an altercation with your loved one where you give a rude reply. You also raise your voice intensely during the conversation. Instead of accepting that you quickly get angry on petty issues, you put the blame on him/her. Again, you avoid the cause of the problem when you very well know deep down inside that you are wrong. Example 4 You go to a formal together where people were mostly talking to each other...

A lockdown for bodies, but minds still wandering... And this distance between mind and body — it’s turning the inevitable pain into self-made suffering. But that’s the downside!! Let’s talk about the upside... the positives through this period. Let’s try to experience these happy realizations: 1. Death connecting us to life People are dying everywhere. It provokes fear of death now and then at every heart, no different you and me. But amidst all these did you realize: We literally experienced our biggest fear Death sitting at home? Gracious we are alive!  Is there a bigger blessing? I don’t think so. Let’s celebrate life with a toast to breath as the biggest reason to smile. 2. Higher sensitivity towards poverty and hunger It’s not only about this lockdown when the poor are dying of hunger. Earlier, most of us could only sympathize. We could not take that one step further — to think about doing something for them. Why? Either shortage of time or our own lives in a turmoil. Now as we standstill, there are more volunteers to think about the poor. This lockdown has taken our sympathies to another level. And that’s wonderful! 3. Turning faces towards the real mirror — Self-awareness We are denied worldly experiences ongoing lockdown. But this phase made us dig deep within to feel ourselves.  The deeper we touch, the darker it feels!! But do you know the sunnier part? At least we are facing the real mirror! We are meeting ourselves everyday. We are knowing ourselves more! No matter beautiful or ugly reflects our face in the real mirror of self-awareness, we are experiencing the taste of our company. It is leading to self-acceptance — the foundation of self-love! 4. Inculcating a new interest Earlier we never got this length of me-time. With a lockdown of direct connections with the outside world, the sharpness of the mind has less to dissect. Maybe it’s time for the soul to reach a deeper dimension without self-judgments. Picking up that half-read old book from the shelf, Tuning-in the chords of the broken guitar, Scribbling emotions in our personal diary,  Pursuing the hobby left out of responsibility, Learning different meditation or yoga practices, Let it be anything that pulls our interest! Who knows, we discover an artist within who flares the life-spark rest of our lives. 5. Connection with smiling nature after decades  Neither money is having the last laugh nor the people. It’s nature smiling! We must feel happy for them.  After all this damage, it resurrected! The air turned cleaner; the tress became greener; the water got purer. Guess what? The renewed nature is blessing us with a healthy life! Do we really need anything else? I feel nothing can draw our interest more than getting richer with nature’s wealth. Let’s celebrate nature, preserve the wealth it’s bestowing! 6. Our battle is always in the inside We have been our comparing lives with people, competing against them. Conveniently we have been blaming them for all the wrong happening with us. But about this time, we are not against outside; we are exploring the truth: We have been battling against our illusions. And it is always about the inside! We are meeting our inner critic... the real audience. And it’s an original ball game altogether. No doubt the battle has got tougher but...

Yes, it all starts with your mind...

Though it is common to face the feeling of sadness, grief, and sorrow at some point in our lives, depression is a serious condition which needs to be unmasked and knocked out. Most of us often confuse between sadness and Depression. And therefore, It is imperative to know the differences and take appropriate measures. 14 differences between sadness and depression  The foremost difference between sadness and depression is that sadness is a temporary feeling. On the other hand, the feeling of depression is over an extended period, can last even for a lifetime. Sadness is an emotional pain which is a reaction to situations. The reasons for sadness are apparent. It could be linked to the death of a closed one, financial losses, failures, homesickness, breakups, fight with the best friend, and so on... Depression is a serious medical illness where one is sad about everything. A situation where everything is fine but the person still feels miserable. Shockingly, there is no apparent reason for depression. Yes, you read it right. A person can feel depressed for no reason.  A sad person craves for the moments once rejoiced; they miss the activities which used to excite them. In case of a depressed person, nothing seems to pull their interest, not even the things which used to give them pleasure earlier...  A sad person relates their sadness only to the causes of sadness. They do not trigger their overthinking mode. The intensity of pain is confined to the reasons for sadness. A depressed person is already hurt. And so, they get affected by petty issues beyond boundaries. They overthink about it. In the process, find self-hurting reasons which have no relevance to the primary cause. As a result, the intensity of pain is unbearable. Feel is the essence of happiness. When a person is sad, he/she doesn’t lose the ability to feel. With depression, the person loses the ability to feel. They feel less and think more. In extreme stages of depression, the feel quotient is almost dead, and the person stops getting affected by anything and everything happening around. When a person feels sad, the motive in their life never subsides. He/She does not give up on their dreams, passion, goals, and ambitions.  A person feeling depressed does not have aims and aspirations. They have no purpose in life. They are unaware of where their life is leading to. A sad person follows the routinary sleep and diet patterns. Even if the pattern gets disturbed, it is for a short time span. In case of a depressed person, it lasts way longer than that... the person may become an insomniac or sleep all day…With diet, either they don’t eat at all or keep munching on abnormal quantities at abnormal timings.  With sadness, one does not feel tired and fatigue the whole day, every day. The reasons can be attributed to the causes of sadness. With depression, one does not feel getting out of the bed the entire day, every day. On top of that, the cause of tiredness and fatigue can be linked to literally nothing. Yes, read it right!!! When a person has reasons to feel sad, he will be sad....

First of all, let us define self-control: According to Vocabulary.com, "Self-control is the quality that allows you to stop yourself from doing things you want to do but that might not be in your best interest." My dear friend, today’s world is full of alluring mediums where you fall prey to the materialistic forces for momentary happiness. Resisting the temptation has become extremely difficult.  Getting carried away to these tempting drives might give you instant happiness and success. It is the reason why you begin to lose your self-control and commit yourself to these choices. But is the success and happiness derived by committing to it real? Does it really last for a lifetime? Let us find out... Why is Self-Control Important? Straight out, there are no shortcuts to success, and happiness derived after fulfilling the never-ending desires is short-lived. You got the reason why is it short-lived. It is because those desires are never-ending. The fulfillment of one just makes making way for the other, resulting in a never-ending vicious flow. This momentary happiness is soon followed by regret. And trust me, this regret adversely affects the self-love. And if continued further, it may even lead to self-harming thoughts. It is immensely important to stay away from these drives. And this is why your self-control has a vital role to play. The stronger your self-control, the less you fall prey to the luring drives.  A few daily-life practical examples where self-control is important... Student, self-control is resisting the temptation of going to your best friend's birthday celebration today when he/she has a difficult exam tomorrow. Ice-cream lover, self-control is resisting the temptation of eating it when you are on a fitness diet. Married man, self-control is resisting the temptation of getting carried by the physical beauty of another woman. Sugar patient, self-control is resisting the temptation of sweets and desserts. Parent, self-control is resisting the temptation of raising hands on your child when he/she commits a mistake. Stressed person, self-control is resisting the temptation of alcohol, which is an elusive stress buster. Monetary-struggler, self-control is resisting the temptation to earn quick money by unethical means like gambling or theft. Failure, self-control is the resisting the temptation of giving up. I am sure you can relate to any of these instances.How is Self-Control Connected to Self-Esteem? In such a competitive and stressful environment where every man is for themselves, self-esteem has become quite essential. And it is your self-control, which is responsible for your boosted self-esteem. If you keep falling prey to the alluring mediums, you will never be able to ride high on your self-esteem. Ultimately, you shall keep on denying the internal happiness. On the contrary, you just need one big situation where you resist yourself to the alluring temptation via self-control. Then off you go, your self-esteem and self-love get an automatic boost. And this boost acts as a solid base to resist the upcoming temptations. Let us find out how this entire process works... AN INDIVIDUAL – SELF-CONTROL – CHARACTER BUILDING  – AVOIDANCE OF MATERIALISTIC TEMPTATIONS – HIGH SELF-ESTEEM –  REAL HAPPINESS. First and foremost, self-control has to be your initiation to do the...

The past is gone; The future is unpredictable. What you have and what you can control right now is your present. It is imperative to feel it to enjoy it. As they say, time and tide wait for none; likewise, you should appreciate the present moment rather than making a hue and cry of your past or worrying about the future. On the contrary, what you do is either you ponder upon your past, or you are busy making plans for future. As a result, you neglect to feel the essence of the present moment.You need to realize that 'now' is the moment to cherish. These small moments in the present moment can only make your life happy. Awareness in the present moment makes every moment memorable in a way where you don't need memories to cherish later. When you enjoy the present, the future is bound to be good. One foot in the past and one foot in the future is just like keeping your feet in two boats and trying to make a balance to stay safe. This way, you will not only hurt yourself but also will lose the precious moments of now. STOP HERE. Take deep breaths. Enjoy the NOW. Don't run away from it. Don't allow your thinking to take control over your feelings. Things will happen. You are neither early nor late. Respect the 'TIME ZONE.' Just flow with each passing moment.  Relax and enjoy the present moment. Learn the art of Meditation to stimulate your feelings, which will keep you away from overthinking. Life is beautiful. Start cherishing every moment now.  

Allow me to begin with a small composition of mine: Speak Speak speak... you speak SPEAK WITH AUTHORITY, SPEAK WITH CLARITY... make sure you get heard when you speak Irrespective of the language YOU SPEAK... as long as you have a voice, you speak don’t wary the criticisms and the questions ... as long as you are right, you speak Don’t worry about losing them, FOR THE SAKE OF FINDING YOURSELF, you speak. To spit out the negativity, for the sake of positivity... gather courage only once to speak on their face and never behind, as long as they are wrong, you speak FOR THE SAKE YOUR RESPECT AND ESTEEM... SPEAK SPEAK SPEAK... YOU SPEAK Hope you liked it! Let's jump right into the nitty-gritty of expressing: Expressing is an introduction of your true self to the outside world. Whatever you are inside, just exhibit it outside. What you are and whatever you feel, just express yourself. Never feel afraid of it. Always remember: “You were born to be real, not to be perfect.” - Claire Baker And this applies to everyone. When you have the freedom of expression, use it to your advantage. You are probably wondering: Why is expressing important? Expressing is your deliberate attempt to convert the negativity felt into positivity. In the world full of lies and betrayals, it is difficult to stop feeling negative. But you need to understand that feeling negative is not a problem.  The problem arises when you keep that negativity within you and do not express it out. But when you express out, you unburden yourself and flush out the negativity.  To maintain transparency between your physical and mental appearance. In case you don't know: There are two facets of your appearance- physical and mental. Expressing acts as a mirror between the two. It ensures that whatever you feel from inside, you present it outside. This way, you are true to yourself and to others. There is no retention of negative feelings inside you to attract other negative energies. You always ride high on yourself via expressing. When you express your true self to others, it means you value your ideas, thoughts, and beliefs. No wonder, expressing is one of the best ways to develop self-love. The quote above says it all... When you express, you expose yourself in front of others. You reveal your true identity to them. In the process, people might get hurt. Many people might not like you. They can call you rude, offensive and aggressive. They might misunderstand you. However, the ones who deserve to be in your life will understand you gradually. They will accept you the way you are. No wonder, these people will be less. But they will be the ones whom you will find by your side every time you need them. It's your identity, this is the way you always are, independent of the person, time and situation. Feel proud! Look: Being nude is always better than being naked. Sounds silly? It's not: Being nude is your choice. It is when you uncover yourself by yourself. It‘s your discretion to expose yourself to others. It is the transparency you...

"Whatever goes around comes around." Yes, it is the bottom-line of Karma. Karma is our action or deed; no matter how small or big. Whatever we do, has an objective behind it. Karma also deals with that objective. If we do something good to others but it has an evil intention behind it, then according to karma, it is wrong. Likewise, if we make a mistake but the objective behind it is pure and pious, then karma treats you accordingly. Let us take an example. If we steal a coin and give it to a beggar who is in need, the motive behind it is compassion. Here, the act of helping overpowers the act of stealing. Therefore, whatever we do, it should have a noble intention behind it. It is what "Karma" teaches us.    

Is your mind crumbling under the pressure to deliver for your loved ones? Are you choking for breath under the fear of society and relationships judging your every move? Is your unworthy job or shaming unemployment raising serious allegations on your capabilities, and you cannot get over your self-judgments? Or maybe you have everything you desire, but there's still a void, an emptiness obscuring the clarity, and the gray follows where you have no answers to your monkey mind. If you are any of the many of us, exhale out your loneliness as it's not only your story.  And we don’t have to commit suicide to get ourselves heard. Yes I used the word Suicide because this is how far depressive thoughts take us sometimes, till the edge of an end.  I promise we shall overcome it together. How does depression feel like?  Although there are different types of depression, I'll try to express that generic feeling in depression I encounter in bouts at uncertain intervals. In my experience, depression feels like: someone is sitting inside my head constantly judging.  a burden to live for the people who are toying with my emotions to fulfill their undue expectations. a loser who never was, and will never be worthy enough. a rat who wants to hide in a hole where society can’t see. pain is endless suffering. Even if there is no reason to feel sad, I cannot find any reason to feel happy. The quandary elevates further where feelings enter the void and there are no expressions at all. That's when I’m convinced the life on the other side is better. Ouch! it hurts to accept this, but that’s how the face of depression looks like in the form of prolonged sorrow turning on the gloominess where joy seems beyond reach. Trails of recovery in broken pieces This is an interesting detail of what happened after an intense suicidal thought. In the silence of the dark, when I thought it's all over, there was a flash of nostalgic memories sending a cool breeze to the face of divine soul.  I felt absolute peace ever While eying death as close, my stress, fear, anxiety, sorrow, suffering, possessions, identifications, all suddenly dropped completely. It was the lightest I ever felt.  I don't know how, but a wave grew out of the blue that swept all the temporary dwellings, each false projection of mind. I sensed freedom, and that provoked a nothing-to-lose attitude that was ready to accept the now and welcome the new. Now I was not wandering unconsciously inside the illusionary boundaries of mind. There was a will to taste every challenge without a drop of complacency. I was singing on the rocks, dancing in the mountains, so to speak. I was feeling my soul beyond thoughts and emotions. It was an experience where I was celebrating my breaths like a comeback from something as devastating as a suicidal thought. I was feeling it, the inhales, and the exhales, sinking deeper with each conscious breath. Yes the power of now was magical as everything was flowing effortlessly then and there. Those moments transpired a recovery. Unlike before, I don't live in the smugness of realized...

Both my sons, Mind and Soul were born in a small traditional family — Inner World. Soul is the elder one... 9 months elder to my younger son Mind. Three of us share a deep emotional connect ! Wondering who am I? I am Consciousness, Mother of Mind and Soul. Three of us live here, Inside The Inner World. We don’t have an apparent existence, but yes, we do have a lot of unheard experiences to share. Allow me to talk more about my sons... How did I look at Soul? Soul my son, was honest like a reflection of plain mirror. Be it anything, he kept nothing inside. He expressed whatever... and this was Soul’s biggest strength. He was the most emotional out of us, the reason Soul was super responsive to his deep-rooted essence — Feelings!! About Mind... He had a strange fascination for his thoughts. He was volatile, he was super-active — the traits that made him vulnerable to everything. Anyone could disguise him; Anything could provoke him. So I took extra care of him. In a nutshell: Soul IS a composite of feelings Mind a manifestation of thoughts The childhood bond between both brothers... They spent most of their time together, and so very well bonded. When Mind had a huge respect for his elder brother, Soul also loved his wee brother. As far as I could see, chemistry between my sons was as beautiful as the perfect picture! As Mind was impulsive, I didn’t let him encounter anything head on. I made Soul to meet the new experiences. And then, his responsibility was to direct his younger brother to respond similarly to same encounters. Everyone knew by now that Mind is his elder brother's reflection. Sooner, he stopped getting any personal attention. Soul answered everywhere, even to the questions asked to Mind. Mind never bothered... in fact, he perceived it as the perks of being younger. No face-off with the new, no efforts, no challenges, nothing... just mugging up the responses directed by Soul. It sounded a good deal to Mind! He had now added a layer of dense cushion around him — and that was the thick boundary of his comfort zone. By and by... Mind became habitually complacent, and Soul was now thoroughly leading his younger brother. All of this was happening under my supervision. I questioned none... neither the expressiveness of Soul nor the ignorance of Mind. We were living happily within the family borders. Being their mother, I was proud of the emotional connect I could build between my two sons. Gradually with: teenage approaching evolution of social world germination of materialistic needs It was time for my sons to step out of their world to meet the outside world. How did soul respond to the outside world? Soul had the knack of expressing his true feelings anywhere; he echoed even here — in the reel world. Most people got offended by his boldness; some even judged his expressiveness. The poor Soul didn’t know transparency levels are different everywhere. And that he’s not supposed to respond candidly everywhere like he does in his inner world. Even he didn’t...