How to get over self judgments stopping to accept the real you?

self judgments

Do you often engage with self-sabotaging thoughts?
Do you feel a pang of unusual guilt during most of your life proceedings?
Is feeling of unworthiness killing you from inside?
Is fear of embarrassments squeezing your natural emotions?

If any of this is customary with you, you often press the button of self-judgments.

Which phase is this?

The hard times when you find more reasons to self-criticize, less to appreciate yourself.

Those scary nights when you either accuse yourself of all the wrong happening with people… or you blame people for all the bad in your life.

The times when you want to stay alone, but could not find peace even in retreat. In fact, it sinks you deeper.

Around all this, you could only suffer like a victim or feel lonely.

I’m sure you are dying to get out of the rut!
But before looking for an exit route, let me ask you:

Have you ever met yourself wherever you are… wearing your own shoes?

What I mean is:
Did you ever meet your lower self in his slumps?
Did you ever treat yourself like your best friend seeking advice?
Or you just cannot take the self-beating, and you walk away ignorant, without facing yourself in the mirror of self-awareness?

What’s stopping to meet the real you?

Most likely your mind is engaging more ━ with people, situations… principally with the outside world.

The more you engage, the more you judge them.
And those judgments in the outside world are leading to judgments inside. That’s dangerous!!

In those mind games, you rarely meet the real you.
You just cripple… lost to the outside world. Everyone else controls your emotions, not you.

You won’t deny:
Even if you encounter yourself in this phase, it’s a subconscious encounter, mostly soaked in negative self-talk.

Everything during this time just shallows your existence, pushing you well within your unexplored boundaries.

Wondering how to surpass this?

Your revival setups with a small conscious self encounter

Try a simple exercise:

Give yourself that me time when you actually step into your own shoes to feel yourself. That zone where there is no one else… not even your mind, not your body.

It’s just you talking to your soul!
Remember the motive of this session is to feel nice about yourself.

Wait… before you start, you need to know:
You just cannot jump into your character and start feeling the depth of your soul straightway.
I feel there is always a medium to reach there until you are that conscious.
Well that medium could be your way of reaching out to yourself.
It could be anything which rests you here, in the now, where you are detached outside and connected inside.

Playing a sport or Connecting to music,
Reading or by Writing,
Meditating or by Yoga,
Singing or by Dancing,
Feeling blessed or Just by being yourself,
That’s simply your choice!!

Let’s do that…

Arrange a small session You with Yourself every day at a fixed time.

No one around, just you attending yourself.
No thoughts landing anywhere…just sail with flowing time!
The session where you try to be good to yourself like you try to be with people.

No matter how:
deep your insecurities,
bad you are hurt,
hard you are hit,
down you are under…
Make sure you host yourself like a hero in this session, the way you would treat your idol or best friend.

You might have partied hard many times; yeah you may consider this is a party where you are not shouting your heart out outside but inside.

Yes even if you have to fake it, you just have to do it with yourself. After all you have been trying to this with others for ages.

Create an atmosphere full of positive energy where you just enter into Your Zone.
The time where you treat your negative thoughts positively, where you handle yourself with care, with compassion, with forgiveness, like you would console your little child.

No matter how short is the length of the session, make sure you enjoy every bit of it.

My biggest hindrance when I tried this

That’s interesting:
Most of us know how to use our brains, but hardly we know how to just let it be, with no thought leading to any apprehension and dilemma that eventually causes stress.

I was no different!

Whenever I tried feeling a hero, either my mind or my body reminded me that I’m easy prey for them. They could beat me anytime they want.

Either of the two barged-in every time I arranged a session with myself.

Whenever I tried holding-on to feel my soul, soon came an overpowering distraction by either mind and body.
I lost the connection….always!!

It led to severe self-judgments. Within no time, it turned into a parasite hollowing my existence, suppressing my weird originality.

A realization changed it all

It was a customary start to the day where I was struggling to tune-in to my soul. It went worse when the frequency of my overflowing judgments reached the edge of the cliff.

But then one beautiful thing happened…They fell down!!
Yes… when I could not judge myself anymore, I gave up.

Well, I know that’s not something worth a medal. But as soon I felt defeated, there was no fear.
When I gave up engaging with myself for some time, that’s when I realized how self-absorbed I was.

The realization led to many positive changes

I started appreciating life the way it is. I was gradually shaving off my ego, learning the art of letting go. I was cutting down the shame in saying: I don’t know.
I accepted my weakness —Poor self-control!!
This acceptance stopped self-punishing bouts. I was encountering less of mind-body distractions meeting my Soul.
Eventually, my self-judgments found an exit route!

Yes that’s how simple it was…Everything now was creating a different dimension, a constructive one!

A dull zero had a vision of a beautiful one
Falling down had a new meaning —Rising
The end was calling out the beginning
Failures were proud of the endurance                                                                             

Self Judgments were transforming into Self Analysis, and I was now holding a broom in my slumps.

So my friend, try being a hero for a little time every day, and you could start feeling the difference. Share your experience at hello@happyrealization.